Narcissists are Character Assassins

After Narcissistic Abuse

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1. NARCISSISTS ARE OUT OF TOUCH WITH WHAT PEOPLE WITH CHARACTER, FEEL LIKE

Narcissists don’t have a real, true and fixed identity. What’s fixed about their personality is that it is DISORDERED. Who they ARE is a classification in a mental health diagnostic manual. With this wonderful factoid under our belt we can begin to explore why the presence of someone WITH character becomes such an envied, enemied, devalued and discarded being.

A parallel example.

Is anyone here a “horse person”? Or a “motorcycle lover”? For anyone who’s ever been part of a passionate hobby that you identify closely with, there are certain INS AND OUTS to even the label “horse person” that you begin to envision what that label means when hearing it: someone who rides every weekend, probably owns a couple of horses, takes care of them, shows them, brushes them out, you can smell the hay…

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Workplace Bullies: The Attention Seeker

The Attention Seeker is emotionally immature and seeks above all else to be the center of attention. They will keep managers on-side by flattery and sycophantic prostrations. With new employees they will likely come across as extra nice and especially helpful. However, this is a ruse to get you into their web. If you do not prove yourself to be one of their adoring fans they will quickly turn vicious.

Their lives are a drama and they will relate every event to something (often bad) that has happened to them or they are going through to gain sympathy in order to manipulate and control. They are easily offended and will claim that they are the “real” victims if they are called on any of their behavior.

They are generally miserable, easily provoked and expecting of deferential treatment while being demanding of others. If you are just starting a new job you will want to identify this workplace bully and be sure to not share any personal information with them (when they are being sweet and friendly) that they will use against you later.

www.stopworkplacebullies.com

Workplace Bullies: The Wannabe

The Wannabe can be one of the most petty and spiteful. They crave recognition for being a valued and highly competent worker. But they don’t have the smarts or motivation to put in the real work that it takes to get there. Instead they hate people like you who are competent and professional.

They are controling, manipulative and very insecure. They cling to questionable qualifications while demanding full respect from real professionals in their field. They will attempt to move into positions where they will have some power over others even if only as a committee member, union representative or limited supervisory position.

Because they are so poor at their jobs they are particularly sensitive and will react with aggression if called on their incompetence. Instead of improving their work skills they spend time watching every move of competent workers to find something to complain about or object to. They will demand that things be done their way even though there are better and more efficient ways of accomplishing the same task. (But if they were competent in their fields they would know that.)

Because they are barely functional as it is they will obstruct any changes or improvement to the workflow. When held accountable they will freak out and play the victim.

www.stopworkplacebullies.com

Workplace Bullies: The Guru

Unlike the Wannabe, the Guru does actually exhibit real competence and may even be considered an expert in their field. The main problems stem from their inablility to deal with others emotionally. They compensate for their emotional immaturity with their intellect. Many of them are very intelligent but emotionally distant.

They may feel that they are superior to others and don’t consider how their decisions will affect other people. They are know-it-alls who don’t recognize the possibilty that they are wrong. Related to this is that they don’t accept responsibility for the consequences of their actions.

Their cold, analytical approach extends into their environment and they may be unusually neat and orderly. They will generally hold to conservative views but not feel constrained by laws, mores or regulations (those are for others, not them).

This workplace bully lives in their own emotionally barren world where they view themselves as intellectually superior. That is why they are genuinely shocked if ever accused of workplace bullying.

www.stopworkplacebullies.com

Records agency to ignore Madigan Army Medical Center diagnoses

US Army SealAn Army agency that sets final medical records for disabled soldiers has been ordered to disregard reports from Madigan Army Medical Center doctors under scrutiny last year for their handling of patients with post-traumatic stress disorder.

The new order by an assistant secretary of the Army is meant to clear the way for up to 21 former Madigan patients to receive benefits for mental health conditions. It comes nearly two years after the Army suspended the hospital’s forensic psychiatry team over concerns that its doctors were reversing PTSD diagnoses.

Those former soldiers were among some 400 Madigan patients who were called back to the hospital last year and re-evaluated by Army psychologists. Of that group, 158 left the process with PTSD diagnoses that should have entitled them to better disability benefits.

Some, however, could not persuade the Army to correct their official records. They were blocked by the Army Board for Correction of Military Records, which in some cases upheld the original diagnoses from Madigan’s forensic psychiatrists denying patients benefits for PTSD.

Related Links: 

Records agency to ignore Madigan Army Medical Center diagnoses
Madigan Hospital Psychiatric Team Altered Soldiers’ PTSD Diagnoses
40% of PTSD diagnoses at Madigan were reversed
Army withholding findings of Madigan PTSD probe
Former Soldier Sues Army for Wrongful Mental Health Discharge
70K Vets Still Have Chance to Gain Retiree Status
Army begins correcting medical records for some former Madigan patients

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Sen. Gillibrand’s military sexual assault amendment to be heard

WASHINGTON — The showdown over Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand’s attempt to fundamentally transform the military justice system for sexual assault victims will begin as the Senate takes up the Department of Defense reauthorization bill, expected to happen this week and as soon as Wednesday.

Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) said she will offer an amendment to the bill when it is on the Senate floor to strip the decision-making authority to prosecute sexual assault and other crimes from commanders, as it is done now, and turn it over instead to military attorneys.

Read more here. http://www.newsday.com/news/nation/sen-gillibrand-s-military-sexual-assault-amendment-to-be-heard-1.6426208

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MJIAMilitary justice overhaul could be limited to rapes, sex assaults

Supporters of a bipartisan Senate plan to reduce the influence of the military chain of command in crime investigations, prosecutions and sentencings are willing to make a deal to limit their initiative to rape and sexual assault cases if that’s what it takes to get the measure passed.

The Military Justice Improvement Act, introduced in May, has been aimed since its inception at doing something about the low prosecution rate of rape and assault cases.

Read more here.

The Military Justice Improvement Act Helps Guarantee Constitutional Rights for All

I support the Military Justice Improvement Act for a number of reasons but first and foremost because it will provide a safe place for survivors to report. And if survivors can report, we can prevent others from becoming victims of these same criminals. The whole premise behind this law is to remove the gatekeepers (Commander and Chain of Command). Not because they all are incapable and incompetent of doing the right thing but because they are trained to be warriors not police, detectives, and prosecutors. Therefore, they can quite potentially hurt a case by meddling in it.

The Commander may know both parties and cannot be impartial in this case. Therefore, we need to treat all cases as if they are worst case scenario so that our response is uniform and consistent. This law is only the first of many steps that need to be taken in order to ensure a fair process for both the victim and the accused. No one wants special rights; no one wants bias in the process.  As a matter of fact, we are making the military’s response to violent crime similar to that of the civilian system. For example, would you report a crime to your boss?  No. You would report a crime to the police, a rape crisis center, etc.

Since not all bases have legal and support services available to them, the next logical step is to turn to the Judge Advocate General, who is more of a legal professional then the Commander. Commanders are not trained to assist traumatized victims, conduct investigations, or study the modus operandi of predators. Most prosecutors are schooled in these techniques automatically just because of their legal training. The ideal scenario would include one place to call or go to assist them with the process. We can’t do this until they report. The SARC or SAPRO can act as a support system but only if they have a supportive Command.  Therefore, we need to guarantee a support system that will review the situation from an objective point of view. The good soldier defense and how long you have served should not determine your credibility.

If you don’t believe the military has a reporting problem, then you don’t know the numbers.  The numbers are staggering and illusive.  The 26,300 troops that the Department of Defense reports are sexual assaulted per year does not include the military service academies, the Coast Guard, or sexual harassment cases.  Unfortunately, the Department of Defense is still referring sexual harassment cases to the Equal Employment Opportunity office, which is a Commander’s program. Therefore once again, if the EEO representative is not supported by the Commander then they cannot help you. Of the 26,300 estimated troops, only 3,374 reported the crimes perpetrated against them.  Sixty-two percent of those that did not report the crime did not report because of fear of retaliation and the impact on their career, and rightly so.

Give Our Troops Constitutional Rights for Veteran’s Day, Pass the Military Justice Improvement Act (MJIA)

MJIA

The Military Justice Improvement Act (MJIA), although not the final answer, is a great first step in our fight for justice for crime victims. Currently, the Department of Defense (DoD) estimates that 26,300 service members are victims of military sexual assault (touching). These numbers do not include other violent crimes, sexual harassment, stalking, bullying, hazing, etc. Of those numbers, the DoD estimates that more then half of them are male victims, which proves that this is not a female issue but instead a repeat offender issue.

The military’s current justice system elevates an individual Commander’s discretion over the rule of law. The MJIA legislation would help us create an impartial system where victims would feel safe to report. They are telling us in their own voices that they do not trust the Chain of Command to handle their cases effectively. Recent DoD studies have shown that 62% of those who reported were in fact retaliated against which reinforces others to remain silent.

The MJIA would not only give them a safe place to report confidentially but would allow a legal professional to determine whether or not a case should be tried in a court of law. The biggest problem with military sexual assault is underreporting. We can’t fix the problem unless the soldiers feel safe enough to report. We can’t rid the military of perpetrators if we do not work together to get a conviction and protect our military and civilians.

Learn more here.

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MJIA

A Comprehensive List Of Obama’s Misbehaving Senior Military Officers

Senior military leaders are supposed to behave in a manner that is morally above  reproach. That, unfortunately, is not always the case. -Business Insider (2013)

Click on name for more information.

Air Force Lt. Col. Jeff Krusinski allegedly sexually assaulted a woman.

Retired Army Gen. David Petraeus had an affair.

Army Brig. Gen. Bryan Roberts got into a fight with his mistress.

Army Lt. Gen. David Holmes Huntoon Jr. abused his staff.

Army Gen. Stanley McChrystal trash talked Obama.

Marine Corps Gen. James Cartwright allegedly had an affair.

Army Gen. “Kip” Ward misused thousands in government funds.

Marine Col. Daren Margolin accidentally shot a gun in his office.

Navy Vice Adm. Tim Giardina cheated at poker.

Army Maj. Gen. Ralph Baker was fired over sex and alcohol.

Marine Corps Maj. Gen. Gregg A. Sturdevant failed to secure his base from a Taliban attack in Afghanistan.

Air Force Maj. Gen. Michael Carey misbehaved on an assignment.

Marine Corps Maj. Gen. Charles M.M. Gurganus neglected to implement security  procedures that would have stopped a Taliban attack in Afghanistan.

Navy Rear Adm. Charles Gaouette made poor leadership decisions.

Read more here