According to the U.S. Army Europe Public Affairs, unit officials conducted a health and welfare inspection of Sgt. Kimberly D. Agar’s barracks room after Agar missed a medical appointment. The corporal was found unresponsive and German emergency medical personnel were contacted. A German doctor pronounced Kimberly dead at the scene on October 3, 2011. An investigation into the cause of death determined Kimberly died by suicide. Kimberly’s mother has since dedicated her life to raising awareness of active-duty suicide rates in an effort to prevent suicide within the active-duty ranks.
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I am still struggling with the loss of Kim. While the dates are correct on the loss of Kim, facts have not been told. There was no health and welfare check that day. I noticed her car in the barracks parking lot and asked our NCO why she wasn’t there. They gave me some story about her being in Landstuhl which was a good hour, hour and a half away, yet her SUV was still there, close to the front entrance of the barracks. Because I was the one who asked where she was, I was told to go check her room. It was myself and another female soldier banging on the door. We had to call the barracks nco to unlock the door. What angers me most is that I believe she’d still be here today if it weren’t for the chain of command. She had been struggling with issues when she came to us. But instead of helping her, a certain CPT at the time put her on blast in front of her entire squad. Something she had asked him not to do. Not only did he violate HIPAA by telling us personal, confidential information that she specifically asked him not to give, the same CPT moved her to a secluded floor, by herself, less than two weeks after her first attempt. I pleaded with them not to move her because I knew she was still at risk but no one listened. There was even an E7 at the time that knew about the first attempt but ignored her pleas. No one did a thing. I can not understand why the people who were supposed to protect her, lied about the events leading up to her death. I will honor her and think of her always. But as far as I’m concerned, the people that know what really happened should be held accountable.
Thank “YOU” for YOUR COURAGE to speak out, as a member of the chorus with Kim. Although I know “we” have had our differences I truly respect the fact that you are speaking out the FACTS of what happened. The very same facts I HAVE BEEN SPEAKING ON for the LAST 8 YEARS… however YOU being on the inside, bring more Credence to everything I have said and I more than appreciate that. God bless you for being willing to do this. There has not been one night I have not gone to sleep crying my eyes out at the epic failure by the military of my only daughter and the Unspeakable torment it must have caused her. I have written my own response to what you wrote and please take it as more insight because it is definitely not derogatory at anything you have said. I am grateful that you have reached out with the TRUTH !
The way Kim was raised in our Christian faith I know for a fact she has forgiven all who had done her wrong. Me on the other hand it comes more slowly as I am human and the process is slow and everyday is a struggle. But I do respect those who tell the truth! Forgiveness will come eventually. The pain is real the loss is real but especially the stigma is real. The Dirty Little Secret of the military mindset is no more evident than what you presented in your post today and I thank you for bringing that awareness! This is exactly, exactly how someone who is a threat to themselves through no fault of their own, but rather from FAILURES of her own EMPLOYER to take care of its EMPLOYEES.
I know for a fact she had made to complaints that were ignored. I know that she was called horrible names for absolutely no reason at all.
She spent 15 months in Iraq surviving two IED complex attacks with blood coming out of her ears giving her SEVERE tinnitus and many other symptoms which gradually horribly affected her ability to hear music and sing on key. And she was bullied for that.
It took four years after the first IED combined with the fact that she was scared to death that her High School memories and many memories in fact, were BECOMING A BLUR. It took four years of much suffering from many symptoms relating to the bombs she survived. It took four years to finally have the courage to go see a doctor and be diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury because she knew it could cost her her job. As I write later on, that’s exactly what happened.
She had many symptoms that she suffered from that I have only found out retroactively and it hurts me as a mother so deeply that there was nothing I could do because I was six thousand miles away. I had put all my eggs in a basket that her employer the US Army would take care of its employees but it did NOT happen. In fact she was shunned as you have pointed out. It’s despicable. it broke me to my CORE. When she was in the chorus she felt like, had she been in combat with anybody, any comrades from the band and Chorus, NO ONE would have her 6 in a fox hole, which is completely contrary to those she was actually in a fox hole with, in Iraq who always had her 6.
In the next comment I will repost what you wrote and insert my own comments on what happened. Again I am grateful and respectful that you reached out and posted what you did.
GOD bless YOU🙏🇺🇸💔
I know we’ve had our differences but I do think about her everyday. I honor her every year for different events and I talk about her all the time. I can only speak on what I was there for
Yes, there were issues vocally and she was corrected for them but i honestly can not recall her ever being bullied for it. At one point we had very tough NCOs who made us all cry and feel like crap but I never saw Kim being singled out in that way. I’m not saying that doesn’t do damage because it does. There are still things that the NCOs said or did to hurt me or humiliate me and it still bothers me to this day. But I know personally, for me, I didn’t know about the TBI until it was too late. I did ask repeatedly for them not to move her into a secluded room multiple times. But I was only a corporal myself. We all were. No one listened. I also have read things about her being found because she missed an appointment, also another lie. But after what happened, not a single investigator asked me. Don’t know why but they didn’t. I’ve written news stations and I’ve tried to get the VA to listen but I’m not being heard. I don’t think I’ll be at peace until there’s some kind of justice for her. They need to tell the truth. She wasn’t taken care of. She was embarrassed in front of her peers by someone she trusted. I’m not in the service anymore but her story will never leave me. The anniversary is coming up soon and it hurts. I can’t imagine the pain you’ve felt but you’ve always been in my prayers.
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